I decided a couple of days ago that it really was time I sorted out my piles; over the last few months they’ve become larger and more widespread and are now completely out of control, it’s not a pretty sight!

I suppose it all started a long while ago with frequent unannounced plops on the front door mat, a leisurely transfer to the kitchen table for an inspection and before you know it there’s dozens of them lying there. That’s all very well, but the kitchen is no place to store them as before long you’ll need the table back again for its rightful purpose, so the piles are gathered together and shoved unceremoniously in a box to join the previous weeks collection.

Over the years I have accumulated a large number of boxes full of piles of various sizes, so now I’m retired, I’ve decided the time has come to get to the bottom of the situation. It’s surprising how many I haven’t even looked at, a sharp knife and a quick slice across the top and the contents soon slide out. So far I have two recycling boxes full of discarded ones and three sacks full of those I’ve shredded. Satisfaction is guaranteed as now all the ones I’ve decided to hang on to are filed, in labelled folders specially purchased for the purpose, where they’ll be easily found and accessed whenever It’s necessary to view the contents.

In one of the larger piles of old papers was a woman’s magazine from 1928 which has seen better days; I’d like to be able to tell you there was an advertisement in there for haemorrhoids or a laxative, but there wasn’t, so you’ll have to make do with this little gem “An ideal gift that will outlast the festive season“. I’m giving you plenty of warning to try and locate one for her indoors before Christmas!

Guaranteed for 5 years“, the advert says, “and brightens a lifetime” – hope I’ve brightened your evening!